Never Better

CONTENTS
Perceived
Goodnight...
What Goes Around
Scorch & Glory
Waiting Her Out
Illicit Indiscretions
Still Life
Why Is It You?
Goodnight, Love
Speechless
No Ordinary Hunger
These Consequences
Vision & Verse
...Allergic to Hair Dye
The Hangover
Fifth Wheel
Complex Refusal
Persistent Delusions
Last Apology
Living History
Biased Advice
Renewal
The Difference
Ballad of a Ring
Infinite the Way We Are
Ashleigh's Song
Saying Goodbye
Certain Lies
Living Hell
You Always Are...
Me & Brian Krakow
The Wrong Way
In One Year
Benefit of Hindsight
Fallen
Today
Waiting
What We Did Was Wrong
Chronic Doormat Syndrome
Gestures
Skirting Perfection
The Rose
All I Offer
Behind the Scenes

Goodnight, Love  

When nothing I say matters
And nothing I say is right
I don't want to say goodbye, love
I just want to say goodnight

Self-sacrifice to unhealthy extremes
Our love is bloody sobs and sacred screams
You lash out and abuse me with spite and indignation
I can't help but overhear your scathing accusations
Slavery and compassion - I can't tell one from the other
I don't know if I'm your girlfriend or your mother
Years from now, will I mourn you or regret you?
I feel like I outgrew you before I ever met you
I feel lost and trapped - I used to be so free
Your disease is terminal - I know. It's killing me.
I pretend you're dying, just to make it through the day
Guilt based on false pretenses is all that makes me stay

Night comes, and you are tired of crying
I am tired of holding back
Biting my tongue raw, and hardening
Postponing the attack
Heartless vile resentment builds
Sympathy keeps me in this cage
I see you while you're sleeping
And love subdues my rage

And nothing I say matters
And nothing I say is right
I'm desperate for a way out
But I won't find it tonight
And nothing I say matters
And nothing I say is right
And I want to say goodbye, love
But instead, I say goodnight

2 Comments:

At 7:33 PM, Blogger Kellie said...

The surprising thing is... this piece is based on a platonic friendship I had with my roommate.

 
At 4:37 AM, Anonymous Seth said...

Something does actually set it apart from you "other" relationship poetry, despite the tone. Also, your use of pet names is a bit telling.

And also, it's funny to leave a comment in this pop-up window which displays a shining, smiling Kellie face next to your comment.

And also, your poem reads differently after reading your comment. And I like that.

 

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