So I finally saw LOTR last night. Sans Maddy's niece Ashley. I ended up going with Julie Fisher. Afterwards she came back to my place and I fell asleep repeatedly while we tried to watch Life as a House. This morning (aka afternoon when I woke up) my mom and I went to Best Buy, and ended up ordering a custom computer. It will have: 512 RAM, 120 GB hard-drive. I didn't want to buy a warranty, but the guy would not shut up and finally my mom gave in. Really my mom paid for it, even though half of it came out of my bank account, since my mom is using my bank account to pay my tuition anyway. It's all the same.
Right now, I'm watching Dogma ("Mass genocide's the most physically exhausting activity there is... next to soccer.") and waiting for Chelle to call, 'cause we're going to Barnes & Noble 'cause I have a gift certificate and need a book on PHP databasing. Maybe later today I'll go and start setting up my dorm room. *scampers off in search of food*
Just a few things to say before I scurry back to the warm green glow of my Xbox... My dad cancelled the pilgrimage to the Wright gathering, and postponed the Powell one until tomorrow, due to sickness and snowfall. My brother gave me the Special Edition Dogma on DVD. Mom & Maddy got me freakish amounts of CDs by Ani Difranco, a book of five plays by Lee Blessing, a phone which I will be exchanging, three shirts (two of which I will be exchanging), plus toe socks and post-it notes and other such glee-inspiring trinkets. Tomorrow, we shop for the Big Gift, which will be a new computer. If anyone is interested in buying my old one, let me know. My father got me an autographed Bottle of Justus CD (plus the Xbox - huzzah!). People seemed happy with the presents I bought them. My Moms should have known better than to buy me clothing, but, what can you do?
New Year's Eve Party details are still being negotiated. It's impossible to make everyone happy, I will do the best I can to be accomodating, but you know, I don't have magic or luck or even charm on my side. I do, however, have Jet Set Radio Future. And without any further rambling... *scurries away*
I just had the single weirdest dream of my entire life!
Guess who was getting married? Seth. Guess who he was getting married to? STEPHANIE.
The only word to describe it? "Surreal."
I was also wanted for questioning in the death of a Muslim girl who I had never met (an angry voice on my answering machine informed me so). David Robinson somehow interferred to ensure that I would never see Lord of the Rings. I think he might have seduced the Brad-Pitt look-alike who was running the projector... it was rather ambiguous... And Kathy Briggs was crying in a parking lot, but I was on my cell phone at the time and I never did figure out what was wrong. And Dan and I were taking lessons on painting china plates.
And Dan and I were in his car, and I turned to him and said, "Tell me this is a dream." And he pinched his nose and said, "Sorry, kiddo."
But it WAS all a dream! Oh, the irony!
But how did we get here? (How the Hell? Christmas! Christmas Eve last year!)
The party was wonderful. The angst was supplied by yours truly - a combination of complete selfishness and self-delusion (ask if confused), and more noble empathy for Justin. Even Megan Hannah had a good time - we talked after everyone left for around two hours. I think I might ask Seth for Brandon's phone number, he's a lot of fun to be around - he drew a monkey on my knee in permanent marker. Everyone is invited to my place, again, for New Year's, where we will be watching the Adult Swim Marathon on Cartoon Network and drinking sparkling grape juice from wine glasses. Because it is New Year's, I think I will allow people to drink whatever they bring with them, with the understanding that a single alcoholic beverage will result in my confiscating your keys. Hopefully, my parents will not be home. You don't have to tell your parents that.
Maddy's niece Ashely came to stay in our house for a bit, she's sixteen and very sweet. We decided to see Lord of the Rings together. I called Steph and she told us to come pick her up. On our way to Steph's, my car died. Completely. It wouldn't start, no amount of coaxing helped. In the middle of all this, Josh called me to tell me that he was on his way home. Ashley and I haven't made it to the movie yet, but eventually, we will get there. And hopefully, I'll see Josh before he goes back to Dekalb. He can tell me all about how I'm single-handedly screwing up my life. (Note: joke.) I did end up seeing Steph, Dan and I went to visit her, and brought her a coloring book and a copy of Rolling Stone, yesterday. Right before I returned home for the beginning of... (drum roll)
Celebrating Christmas with Four Different Sets of Extended Family Members:
8:00-11:00pm Monday Night - Maddy's Family
5:00-9:00pm Christmas Eve - Dad's Family (Wrights)
11:00am-5pm Christmas Day - Dad's Family (Powells)
TBA - Mom's Family (Benners)
By far the most lively branch is Maddy's, but it's distracting whenever I realize that Monica's children are all twenty or older and still live at home, along with their signifigant others. Plus, I can't quite keep track of who are Monica's kids and who are Kim's. I also enjoy the Powell's, because they're the card-playing, smoking, red-meat-eating, small-town-dwelling, on-the-run-from-the-law, rodent-raising, weed-growing, multiple-divorcing, everyone-has-twelve-kids-and-dies-before-they're-seventy side. Honestly, I enjoy my family gatherings. Because "I'll do anything for a little unqualified affection" - no, actually, it's because they all tell me how much skinnier I look, without fail, every time... Right before they ask me if I "have a man yet" and I stifle a gag, saying something clever like, "Who has time?" or "Men are stupid. Throw rocks at them." And, of course, there's just something about family gatherings that sort of remind you of the circle of life and of the fact that you came from somewhere.
I am preoccupied with my dream. I just... wonder what it's going to take for me to be happy. Sometimes I think enduring happiness doesn't exist. Sometimes I think it exits, but not for me. Sometimes I think being happy is just a matter of properly manipulating yourself, teaching yourself to expect less. But what kind of happiness would that be? The thing is, I like being single. I do. It's a pleasant mix of loneliness and euphoria. And I think the next time a guy tells me he doesn't want to be involved without a lifetimee guarantee, I'll tell him to find someone else to play mind games with, I'm not interested. But when I think about being single forever... now that bothers me. Maybe the trick is to approach relationships as though they are just one more thing that we have no control over. They come, they go, without reason or fault. You're happy for a while, then you're sad. That's just how it is. That's always how it is. And nothing you can do will make a difference. The only choice you make is whether to be a participant or a witness. And I guess... I'd rather Tango to Hell.
What is it about the Holiday Season that brings out this ridiculous introspection? It's like, "Oh, it's Christmas. I should probably get lonely and depressed." No thank you. I'm going to take a cue from The Rooster and eat myself some mf'n candy (and play myself some mf'n Xbox). Oh, and the person who finds the most references to Rent in this post gets a special prize. You have to identify each one and what song it's from to win.
So... I still can't find what my brother asked me to get him for Christmas. That's the only present left to buy, though - yay! And, I found and purchased Fuzion Frenzy, so hopefully people will play it with me when they come to my party, which, in case the news did not reach you, is tomorrow (Saturday) at 8pm. I have presents and cards for many people. If you do not come to the party, I will try to get your presents to you eventually. Like in January.
The trip to Iowa was very fun... Dan and I wrote a song about how confusing the Iowan Highway System is. The chorus goes something like:
Doing 79 down a country road
Got a radar detector, we're ready to go
Where is Highway 30? Well, we don't know
Is Iowa the Mouth of Hell? We think so
Ohhhhhhhh... We hate Iowa...
And there's more where that came from. When we actually got to Cornell and picked up Kat, we got kicked out of a bar (you have to be 19 to order food or water), ate at Taco Bell, and browsed a small grocery store. We hung out in the lounge of her dorm and waxed depressive. We went to sleep.
Speaking of sleep... I have to get up to be at U-High by 7am tomorrow. But I'm going to try not to complain, because I got a check for $120 in the mail today. Chronic exhaustion is a comparitively small drawback to this coaching & judging scam. =)
Oh, and I moved into my new dorm room today. It was pretty quick & painless. Right now, I'm the only one who lives there. I hope that either it stays that way for the entire semester or that I get a decent roommate assigned to me. But if I get another inconsiderate succubus, at least I can conveniently impose myself on Dan and Jeff, who will live happily (everafter) just one floor above me!
::joking pre-holiday faux-sinister chicken-witch cackle:: Life = Sweet.
This is my third post in less than two hours. I think that should be plenty of evidence of how little work is getting done this morning at Rambo House.
I just have three... somewhat random... things to say:
1.) I want to write my own holiday song.
2.) "I'll do almost anything for a little unqualified affection." That line is from The Object of My Affection (the book but not the movie, for some reason), but it keeps reminding me of myself.
3.) My Grades: 3 A's and 2 B's. I got an A in British Literature, which means I scored a 97% on the Final Exam. To which I say, "Woah." I scored a 24/25 on the Chem Final, but still got a B in it, and in FOI ::ferocious growl::. My G.P.A. is 3.6, I guess I can live with that... and my parents will just have to cope.
My car died on me last night. It was horrible. It was working fine, I parked it at the mall, and when I came out and tried to start it, it just... wouldn't. It didn't sputter or anything. Just completely dead. First we put fuel in it, that didn't help. We gave it C-CPR and that didn't work, so my mom bought a new battery and put that in, and suddenly it worked. I was very worried about my car. I kept saying, "It's okay, we'll take care of you" very quietly under my breath.
...I'm a dork.
...So... I'm going to attempt to move into my new dorm room today. By all accounts, this should be both possible and kind of fun. And then I have coaching at U-High. I'm going to try to see people and invite them to my party. After coaching... Dan and I are going to Iowa! We are leaving around 5:00 (whenever I finish coaching). He's providing car, driving, and directions. I'm providing gasoline and snacks. I'm not sure exactly what we'll do in Iowa, but we will see the place where Kat lives and attends school. And we're returning Friday, probably leaving around noon, getting home in plenty of time for Dan to go to work.
Then I'm judging a speeech meet Saturday, and having a small party afterwards (Huzzah!) I'm thinking it will start around 8pm, and it probably won't be a very late night because I have been getting up before 8am almost every day for a week now and I don't know how much energy I will have. Basically I am having a party so I can see everyone. And give them presents and cards.
::sigh:: It's the Christmas season and I miss everyone so much! I realized last night that I'm writing cards for people I haven't seen since this summer. Plus, I'm remembering last holiday season, complete with Thespian Secret Santas... going to Dekalb for the Lame Christmas Drinking Party... and seeing Lord of the Rings three and a half times... or was it four and a half? Speaking of which, someone has to go see that with me. I've already missed my chance to see it the day it opened, I have to see it by Monday or it will take all the Merry right out of my Christmas.
On the plus side... Jet Set Radio Future for Xbox is really pretty fun, and I only have one gift left to buy and wrap. After Christmas comes and goes, I'm going on a quest to find Fuzion Frenzy.
Considering that this is supposed to be break, I'm remarkably busy.
I'm working this week at the Rambo House, and I'm coaching speech team at U-High. I still need to talk with Justin, Cori, and Kat, regarding whether or not Dan and I are going to Augustana and Iowa this Friday... and if we are, I need to tell Mr. Allen that I cannot judge at the speech meet on Saturday. Because I lack the magical power of being in two places at once.
My father already gave me my Christmas present. He is such a freak. It's an Xbox. If I end up having a nice pre-Christmas Gathering (I'd like to, don't get me wrong), we can all watch My So-Called Life on DVD and play Sega GT Racing and a Japanese game involving graffiti (can you say trippy?). I'm still hoping to find Fuzion Frenzy used somewhere... they stopped making it, which really upsets me 'cause it's a big part of the reason I wanted an Xbox in the first place. ::frowl::
My Christmas shopping is probably less than half over, and I'm beginning to freak out just a little around the edges. But I am sublimely happy for no good reason today. I think it was the combination of sleeping late and drinking a Bagelman's Java Freeze for breakfast. I was positively giddy when walking from the parking deck to work, I was singing "Let's Have a Patrick Swayze Christmas" - which I was listening to (from the CD that Renata gave me last year) last night while wrapping gifts. Thanks, Renata. The people I work with think I'm insane, but no matter. =)
Oh! So Those were Finals. Huh. Oh, my. ::deep breath:: Oooh, I can breathe... feels nice... Damn, my hand hurts. The English final was 22 short answer, 6 long answer, and 2 essay. My poor, poor right hand is even more deformed than usual. I want someone to do medical experiments on my hands. It's not enough that I know they're deformed. I want some kind of certified proof.
I realized sometime in the past few days that I really, really, really love my car. I still pretty much hate driving, but I really love my car. She was whining and wheezing from the cold, and I was all, "It's okay, it's okay..." and petting the dashboard as though it were alive... You know, I learned to drive in that car. I crashed it on the day of my first prom. I drove it to and from rehearsals for No Exit and The Author's Voice. I drove it to meet Eva at the airport when she came back from Germany. I drove it to my first day of work at my first job. I crashed it into Rob's mailbox, I drove to Stanford in it after dropping off Josh... I have so many memories that involve that car in some way or another... I drove it when I was in love, when I was lonely, when I was lost, literally and metaphorically. The more I thought about it, the more I realized how attached I was. Driving any other car just isn't the same.
The first thing I did when I was done with finals, I threw away my chem formula sheet. Then I went to visit each of my parents. Then I came back to my room, where Karissa was and currently is in the process of packing up her things. My R.A. asked me if I was moving out, and I confirmed that I was. I cleaned a little bit, then sat down at my computer to catch up on my comics and blogs. I called Seth. I started a bunch of downloads... and now... a month of freedom stretches before me.
So what does break hold for me?
The Buying and Making of Christmas Gifts.
The Writing of Christmas Cards.
Moving into Hamilton.
Road Trip to Iowa.
Lots of Reading (around 13 books).
Lots of Writing.
Improvements to Never Better.
Planning and Promoting T.A.M.S.P.
Coaching U-High Speech
Lots of Movies (the ones I didn't have time to watch all semester).
So... working backwards... I just got out of my history final. Unbeknowst to me, my teacher had decided to make half the questions from the final the exact questions he used on the midterm. Ask me if I'm glad I made 30 flashcards and memorized every single question from the midterm. Why yes, yes I am. (Why do you ask?)
I spent all day today, parts of last night, and parts of yesterday afternoon, studying history and English and writing the essays for the English exam. One is on Virginia Woolf, the other is on the threat of apparent civilization (aka comparing Beowulf and Sir Gawain and the Green Knight.) I alternated between haunting Milner Library, Avanti's, and my living room.
Sunday night, Dan, Jeff, Caitlin and I went to Panera's, Spencer's, Gadzooks, and then to my house to watch The Sopranos (after Jeff got the sticky-breast-looking-purple-toy stuck to the mall ceiling, and Dan used a long pole to get it down, while onlookers chuckled.) We played games (i.e. Scrabble) and ended up sleeping in the basement, where it was cold and Dan snored. Lots of funny things happened, but aren't worth explaining; they're the kind of things which aren't funny once you've explained them.
Saturday night, Dan called me and convinced me to pick him up from work. Then he convinced me to bake frozen pizza. Then he convinced me to go to Harry Potter with him. We had a great time, and got really into the movie... I'm glad he made me go, but I kinda wish I had made him go see "the beautiful people" (his words to describe David, Rob, and Alyssa) in One-Acts... because One-Acts needs more support than any other U-High enterprise IMHO and because then I could've gotten a lot of studying done... But, y'know, it's good to have your plans f'd up every once in a while. It builds character, or something. I have no idea what I'm talking about. (Why, do I sound like I do?)
Friday night, I saw One-Acts. The following is my brief opinion of each show:
Crimes of the Heart
Liz Johnson did very well, indeed. I applaud her in making a character who embodies the word "stereotype" really come to life, with depth and believability. Emily Dougherty was both hysterical and heart-breaking, a captivating actor with wonderful presence. (Megan, do you think she'd do one of my plays?) I was actually pretty impressed with Meredith, who played Chick. I'm not sure if she is a good actor, or if she was just well-directed. I wasn't terribly moved by the other sister, she seemed reluctant in her role, relying on the other actors to carry her through the production. I applaud Ms. Griffin on her directing - anyone who can make Schini not completely suck has my admiration.
Rating: 3 stars (out of 5 possible).
Highlight: Liz chasing Meredith with the broom.
Antigone
The translation that was used... kind of got to me at times. It was modern, at the expense of being ridiculously without subtlety. At times this was interesting ("All those who had to die... died."), at time, it was excruciating. But the actors made up for a questionable script. Alyssa Huff rocked my socks with her enthusiasm, devotion to the moment, and command of the character. Rob gave me profound and eerie de ja vu (sp?). Marion was poised and precise, Becca was an at once believable and irritating Ismene.
Rating: 4 stars. Fine holiday fun*.
Highlight: Antigone asking Creon what she will have to do, every day, to be happy. (Well done, Alyssa!)
*fun = Greek Tragedy
As Bees in Honey Drown
Easilly the most "challenging" script for a group of high school students. I never knew Amanda could act! Or Matt for that matter... I knew David could act, and this show was no exception, he did wonderfully. Amanda and David dealt wonderfully with the Mature Subject Matter that high school directors usually avoid at all costs. Kudos to the director. How Amanda went from "But Papa, we do not feel that way" to this performance... is beyond me. Amanda and David had great chemistry, great timing. David and Matt had great chemistry, great timing. David Robinson's facial expressions are to die for. The fourth actor's performance doesn't seem worth mentioning... No offense. This production came together beautifully.
Rating: 4 stars.
Highlight: "Lesbians will inherit the earth."
Charlie Brown
I wouldn't feel right about publicly slamming this show. I will say that I don't think the problem was the acting. The problem was probably those infinitely long pauses, during which I just pictured people backstage, whisper-screaming, "WHERE'S JASON?" and "GO! NOW! GO!" But... I'm not going to write anything else about this show. (Partly because I don't know whether "train wreck" is one word or two.)
Rating: I plead the fifth.
Highlight: Will Irvin's Dracula. Honestly, I think it was the only thing in the show that made me laugh.
So what do the coming days hold for our R.A.I.? Tomorrow morning, the English and Chemistry finals. Beyond that... Freedom, glorious FREEDOM!
I turned in my massive history paper. I finished editing it the morning before it was due and barely thought about it all day. But then, as soon as I handed it to my professor, I started freaking out. My brain was like: "AUGH! It's out of my hands! Literally and in the sense of I have no control! Help!" It was such a profound feeling of helplessness. That's how I would describe college finals: helplessness. Or maybe "desperation." ...No, "helplessness." Maybe "desperate helplessness."
Last night, I reviewed for the philosophy exam with Amanda. I think Paul was right, the best way to learn is to teach. It was good for me to have to explain all of those words and concepts and ideas, it was like a little refresher course for me. I'm going to spend the morning with my flashcards, go to English at 1pm, take the exam at 2pm, then head over to U-High... I wish I could get a ride so I didn't have to walk in the cold... to coach speech team. Hopefully, I'll hear from someone with a car (i.e. Kathy or Levi) in time, and they will pick me up from U-High, we'll go to dinner, then come back to see the one-acts. I'll get a ride home afterwards and begin writing the essays for my English final. I'll spend Saturday morning at the speech meet, studying history and English. Then there's a Halogen Blue show Saturday night that I'll probably go to. Sunday and Monday, I'll study history pretty much exclusively, taking a break for the Gadzooks Friends & Family Sale (25% off everything in the store, 6-9pm). After I've taken the history final, I'll do the online review for the chem final. I'll go over my essays for English, and my flashcards, and maybe get together for lunch with Erin so we can quiz each other.
I'm probably not going to sleep in my room again until Karissa moves out. She has taken to watching BET, talking on the phone, and throwing things until five or so in the morning. As retaliation, I go home at night, then come in the next morning at 8:00 and watch ER until I have to go to class. Yesterday she called me a rude snob and I called her a selfish succubus. I'm pretty sure she has no idea what a succubus is.
I'm not a snob, right? I can admit I've been rude to her, but for good reason... But a snob?
Today was the Guerilla Party. Apparently (I didn't know this) people love me. =) I got two awards, a Best Actor Award for the Fat Girl Monologue, and the Diversity Award... both were complete surprises, and I wanted to share my joy with you all.
Amanda liked my present of Coke, Twizzlers, and a CD with colorful liner notes featuring Prof. Gorr Quotes. My Secret Santa was Parag, and he got me some spectacularly cute Christmas toe socks - exactly what I asked for. =) One pair has reindeer and snowflakes, and the other pair has penguins!
I'm going to miss Sara Jessee so much. She was one of the reasons I joined Guerilla - when I saw her perform at Passages, my decision was made - and I'm very sad that she's graduating.
I would rant about my FOI grade and how I'm being SCREWED, but it would only upset me... So, again, a run-down of the next few day's events and tasks:
I saw the Madrigal dinners last night. I didn't think much of the script, despite adoring the alumna author. There were a lot of very not funny jokes, and the jokes that were funny were repeated so much that they became not funny. Megan, Chelle, Liz, and Allison all did very well with their parts, many people (i.e. Talia) were pretty much wasted in their "characters." Of course, the script in a Madrigal is secondary to the music, which seemed good despite claims by the Madrigals that they suck. Court Singers sounded particularly good, better than previous years. (Occasionally when David and Rob combine forces, the results can be quite good.) While we were at the performance, Dan was monkey-hugged by three different people, and Renata was almost the fourth. Tres amusing.
After the dinner, Dan and I made pumpkin pies and watched cartoons, I went to bed around 1:30, and then I went to English this morning at 9:00. At 10:00, the Roommate Change Database opened up, and I got the only vacancy in South Side. It's on Hamilton 3 - one floor beneath my best friend! Yay! Philosophy was over in a fingersnap. All we have is the exam on Friday, and we're done with that. I went over to introduce myself to my new roommate, only to find that both of the girls who live there now are moving out. So... I'm alone for the moment, but it probably won't last. I don't care who I get stuck with, it has to be better than Karissa. She had her moments but is, all in all, impossible to get along with.
Speaking of impossible to get along with, I went by Nick's to drop off the old copies of the Indy that he loaned to me way back when. He didn't want them back. We talked for a little while, it was awkward to the point of being painful, so I got out as quickly as I could and now, I'm debating between which of the following projects - which will serve as the reasons I won't be posting much for the next two weeks - I should work on next... Probably better to do them in the order that they're due, I supppose.
Wow, I can't believe how long it's been since I've posted. At least the last one was pretty long. I wish this one could be super long, but there's not really time. I'm on my mom's laptop - Will doesn't believe in sharing the DSL line with me, jackass.
My Thanksgiving was practically painless. I watched the 12-hour Buffy Marathon in the basement, hiding from the relatives, who left early anyway. There wasn't room for my bro and I to eat at the table with the elderly & super-annoying, so my mom told us we could just eat in our hide-out. I at least stood at the door and said goodbye to all of them, Will couldn't be bothered. I have a little lingering guilt, but my mom didn't mind. She only invites them so she doesn't feel guilty about not going to see them at Christmastime. So... yeah. My relatives don't like me anyway. I'm scary with my black hair, or so they say.
Friday night, Josh had a gathering, and Kathy drove me to it. It was a crazy night for me to not have a car. I rode with Kathy to Josh's, hung there while Bret Swanson ate a decorative gourd (why do all my Bret Swanson stories involve him eating weird things, or kissing people?), then rode with David Nolan to see Die Another Day with Julie, Cori, Justin, Kat, Steph, Dan, basically the Old School Crowd. Then we all went to my house where they ate pie and lots of cheese ("It's still good! It's still good!") and crackers. Then Dan drove me to Steve's, which is where Josh's party had relocated to, where drunk Big Toe taught Dan some Yoga, and we caught up with Julie Grubar, who works at a skating rink. Then I made Josh drive me home when he left, where he blew me away once again with his theatre evangelism. He is spreading the gospel and I applaud and envyhim for it. Oh, to believe in something and be so articulate about it... ::sigh::
Last night, I had my gathering, and it was most excellent, despite temporary relocations to Denny's and then, much later, Dan's house. There was giddiness galore, a little angst, and some drama, but I think a good time was had by all. In another couple weeks, everyone will be home again for Christmas, and it will be magical. I think we should do the predictions thing even if it is remotely connected to Britney Spears, and maybe do a Secret Santa thing... or maybe just a big game of Assassins? I'm open to suggestions here, people. But right now I have to run along.
Its a brand new season and we all know that seasons always call for new wardrobes and apparels. So if you are looking
for designer womens
shoes such as top of the line steve
madden shoes then you should visit Solestruck for the best selections.
Solestruck is known for it's great quality shoe
products and low prices on womens shoes.
SoleStruck.com!